Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Randomize