So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
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