how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Randomize
