I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
