I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
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