and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
