Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
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