tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Randomize