You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
Randomize
