It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Last time i carry you out of a forest
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
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