Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
