I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
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