I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
