She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
Randomize