There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
i need to put some appletini on your dick
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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