So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
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