When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
