And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
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