just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize
