Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
