that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
