When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I think my fart just growled at me.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
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