Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize
