YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
God, you're like boner-b-gone
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
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