when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
farters have to be the big spoon...
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Randomize