I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
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