glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
