This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
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