____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize