the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
look no pants
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
