i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Randomize
