Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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