make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Randomize
