8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
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