Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
