Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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