butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize
