Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
Randomize
