so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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