Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
