Redeem this text for a blowjob
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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