I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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