garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Randomize
