I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
It's never too late to be topless.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
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