Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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