He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Randomize
