did you get engaged???
Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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