At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
It was like getting head from an anaconda
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize
