how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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