Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Randomize
