ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Randomize
