she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Are my feet made of real feet?
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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